Couples Therapy In Seven Words

Be Kind, Don’t Panic, and Have Faith. Psychologist Dr. Bruce Chalmer and educator Judy Alexander talk about relationships, and answer your questions.


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Did you know that sexual desire and sexual arousal aren't the same--that you can be capable of arousal but have little desire, or have a lot of desire but experience little arousal? We have a lively, engaging interview with the Orthodox Sex Guru and Queen of Vibrators herself, Dr. Bat Sheva Marcus, whose book Sex Points was released earlier this year. 

The series on vibrators Bat Sheva mentions can be found here.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by the Fyre and Lightning Consort. Visit us at brucechalmer.com/podcast. Get Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark here or wherever you get books.


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What's funny got to do with couples therapy? We talk to Izzy Gesell, a funny man who teaches us how to let ourselves be vulnerable enough to risk being foolish--and along the way, opens our hearts. We play an improv game to illustrate that takes a rather risqué turn!

Izzy's website is IzzyG.com.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by the Fyre and Lightning Consort. Visit us at brucechalmer.com/podcast. Get Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark here or wherever you get books.


If you had an affair, are you a total screw-up? Is there hope for healing? What if your partner cheated? Spoiler alert: Healing is possible--but it's not easy. We talk about cheating, guilt, apologies, and the possibility that a couple can survive an affair. And we handle a listener question from someone who's in the middle of it.

Send in your questions: email us at bruce@brucechalmer.com, or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort


Help! My mother-in-law is crazy, and I don't know how to handle it! When you marry someone, you're marrying their family too. We talk about how to manage difficult in-laws, and transform a crazy relationship into an enriching one.

Send in your questions: email us at bruce@brucechalmer.com, or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort


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A delightful conversation with Susan Bratton, who teaches couples how to go from just having sex to making love. Susan tells us about the Sexual Soulmate Pact, how to get the juices flowing even when desire has been long gone, and how both women and men can learn to say what they want and hear what their partner needs. Susan shows us her favorite vibrators, and tells us how to use them. Rated PG-13.

Susan's websites we mention in the podcast are: sexualsoulmatepact.com, personallifemedia.com, and betterlover.com.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by the Fyre and Lightning Consort. Visit us at brucechalmer.com/podcast. Get Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark here or wherever you get books.

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Okay, let's get snarky. Everybody comes in to couples therapy saying, "We need to communicate better." No you don't! (Well, you probably don't--okay, it's complicated.) We talk about why it's not about how you talk. And then we handle a listener question.

Send in your questions: email us at bruce@brucechalmer.com, or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort

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Your wife has just tricked you into giving your irrevocable blessing to the wrong son. Can you get past that? We interview Isaac and Rebecca, and along the way we learn how complicated things can get when the voice of God gets involved.

Send in your questions: email us at bruce@brucechalmer.com, or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Kol Sason v"Kol Simcha by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort

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What would you do if your husband had just taken your son to sacrifice him, and was stopped at the last second? Sarah and Abraham reached out to us to help them with the marital fallout from this event, and we do our best to offer a path to reconciliation--with mixed success.

Send in your questions: email us at bruce@brucechalmer.com, or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Kol Sason v"Kol Simcha by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort

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Wait a minute. Our seven-word formula says, "Be kind, don't panic, and have faith." And I (Bruce) go around claiming that it's the faith part that heals people. So what does that mean? We pick up on some reviewer comments, and some questions from Judy, and explore what faith means in the context of helping couples heal. 

Send in your questions: email us at bruce@brucechalmer.com, or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Besamim (Spices) by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort

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He's always blaming her. She's tired of it. Can they work it out? We interview Adam and Eve to see if we can help them resolve their troubles.

Send in your questions: email us at bruce@brucechalmer.com, or just visit brucechalmer.com. We'd love to hear from you!

And let us know if you'd like to be interviewed on the show! Visit brucechalmer.com/podcast for more information.

Dr. Chalmer's book Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back is available here, or wherever you get your books.

Like this podcast? Review us, like us, follow us, and do all those other kinds of wonderful things to us! It helps people find the show.

Music: Kol Sason v"Kol Simcha by Bruce Chalmer, performed by Fyre and Lightning Consort

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